


Happy new year, Severus

by Assommoir



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Christmas Fluff, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Hogwarts Professors, New Year's Eve, annoying old ladies
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-05-22
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:35:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,770
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24319684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Assommoir/pseuds/Assommoir
Summary: Everybody wants to marry Severus off. As to Severus, he just wants to be left alone. (Translation of my french fic "Bonne année, Severus")
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Severus Snape
Comments: 3
Kudos: 22





	Happy new year, Severus

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After a fellow author translated one of my fics to english I decided to try my hand at translating another one of my own. It was very fun and I hope you will like it ! It is nothing much, just a bit of holiday fluff.
> 
> I hope that I didn't make too many mistakes, let me know if it is too annoying !

Striding on the paved way towards the back of the castle, Severus Snape, 39 years old - almost 40, prodigious Potions master, blew his hands on his freezing hands, his cape tightly fastened around him to keep him from the early winter cold. He turned on the muddy road on his left, leading to the greenhouses 4 to 7, congratulating himself on his choice of wearing weatherproof dragon leather boots today, resistant to the puddles and splashes associated with bad weather. Scotland in december, what a treat ! That being said, he had to admit that the location of Hogwarts in the Highlands was an excellent idea to assure an optimal protection. Moreover, they could enjoy the splendid surroundings, wonderful landscapes… when it didn't rain.

Once in front of greenhouse number 7, he struggled with a climbing plant barring his way, closing the door just in time before a small yellow plant with feet escaped between his legs. He had to gather urgently a small quantity of thorns from bloody red roses, thusly named, contrary to one might believe, not for their scarlet color, but for their properties in sooting menstruating women by improving the blood flow. Or, dosed to excess, inducing a violent hemorrhagic death. In potions like in all magical areas, you had better think twice before acting, and especially, find a trusty potioner to heal the family. Usually, Poppy ordered the feminine potions at the Hogsmeade apothecary, but in this end of year holiday season, his only potions apprentice had gone home to his parents for a few weeks, leaving him alone to carry out all orders.

Moving deeper into the exotic plants maze, he heard whispering voices at the back of the greenhouse, one male and one female. It was Mr Longbottom and Ms Granger, the two new residents of Hogwarts. The former was here to train beside Pomona, to take over once she left (while she loved her teaching job, she dreamed at 50 years old to have a go at permaculture in the south of France). Severus wasn't surprised to see him crouching down, his hands in a big pot filled with mud and clay. However, what he didn't expect to see here, was the young ex-Gryffindor, perched on the tip of her toes on top of a wobbling stepladder, propped unstably against a regular looking apple-tree.

"Severus ! To what do we owe the pleasure of your presence here today ?" she exclaimed, cutting short her conversion with Longbottom.

"Hello, Ms Granger, Mr Longbottom." he answered with his deep voice, "I am here to collect thorns for a potion."

One hand delicately laying on a branch, the other held toward a beautiful green apple growing on that same branch, she seemed to caress the wood tenderly, with an infinite patience. "Yes gorgeous, give your little fruits, yes good, that's right…" she encouraged the tree to free the apple in her hand. "Yes ! Oh.. Oh bollocks…"

Until, carried by the momentum, she lost her balance, caught at the very last moment by Severus, who had been able to put himself in the right place with two steps. Weirdly, neither men had thought of using magic to slow down her fall.

"Are you alright Hermione ? Truly, heights do not suit you, whether on a ladder or on a broomstick… I'm wondering if Minerva was right to give you a room in one of the towers !" said Neville, half worried and half teasing.

Leaning on Severus, she stood straight while mumbling : "Yes, ok, no need to make a big deal out of it… Thanks, Severus."

Severus, meanwhile, could still feel the phantom weight of her hands in the places where she had touched him.

"Don't make a habit of it, Ms Granger, or I will have no choice but to take points from you."

He realised he had just made a joke and decided a strategic withdrawal was in order to protect his reputation : a rescue and humor, that was how one turned into a Gryffindor.

Billowing his cape behind him, he left towards the rose garden, took what he needed, and strode away, leaving two amused people behind him : did Severus Snape finally have a human side ?

* * *

On the way back, thorn bag under his arm, Severus decided to grant himself one cigarette to loosen himself up after this social interaction. He had to admit how much his students - Ms Granger most of all, had changed in two years. Longbottom, thanks to his key position during Voldemort's last year of terror had gained much self-confidence. As to Ms Granger, she was still the same bookworm, curious and prone to asking a thousand questions a minute, always with a book - in her pocket, at breakfast, even while walking - but she did seem more mature, giving out the image of an intelligent, confident and blooming young woman.

She had arrived at Hogwarts on the night of Halloween, to the surprise of all but Minerva, soaked from head to toe by the storm rumbling outside, carrying only a yellow rain jacket and a small pearl bag as luggage. Once dry, the belly full from a warm meal and her hands around a steaming cup of tea, she had explained to them why she came. Feet folded under herself on a deep armchair in the teachers lounge, she had confided in them that the academic counsel of Hogwarts had commissioned her to write a new updated version of the _Hogwarts, a history_ , taking into account the elements linked to the second war against Voldemort. As an unconditional fan of the book, war heroine, and committed journalist, she had been immediately nominated for the job.

At Professor Sprout's request, she had explained to them that she had spent the last two years travelling in the wizarding world while writing news reports on social issues in Britain and away. She had been published mainly by alternative medias first and had obtained recently a column in the _Daily Prophet_.

During the discussion, Severus stayed well away, leaning over a pile of homework to grade, while the others gathered on the lounge chairs around Ms Granger. However, as the evening went on, he could not help himself from listening in, and admitted grudgingly being impressed by the young woman's experiences. When she left school, she could, as many of her classmates did, have moved in a small suburban house and found a paperwork Ministry job to pay the bills, trying to find a semblance of normality after the trauma of the war. Her therapy had been to travel the world with her two best friends, confronting herself to both richness and poverty. She had seen warzones, hunger, but also spectacular landscapes, communities where the people were at the center of the decision-making, were life prospered day after day organically.

Yes, Ms Granger was not, indeed, a stubborn young student anymore, but a determined young woman giving herself the means to succeed. And that, Severus could only admire.

However, she had decidedly kept her infernal mane of hair, seeming to have a life of its own, while she tried in vain to tame it by sticking various things in it such as feathers, muggle pens, ribbons, strange colourful velvet covered hair bands… Severus could only raise skeptically one eyebrow seeing her outfit of the day, an oversize overall with one tie unattached over her shoulder, her hair tangled and a trace of mud on her forehead. _And a smile to make you weak in the knees._ Without mentioning the days where she wore sparkly tights under her dresses, or polka dot tights, or even wool coloured tights. In all honesty, the sight of her legs was a terrible ordeal for his eyes most days. _Hum._

No, most clearly, Ms Granger only had a passable physique and Severus was not interested in the slightest. Calmly, he inhaled one last breath of tobacco, crushed his cigarette under his foot, and, with a confident smile, went on his way toward the castle.

* * *

A few hours later, as the night began to fall upon Hogwarts, Hermione and Neville walked towards the teachers lounge to join the other adults who stayed behind during the holidays for a festive tea. Some freshening up was done promptly before entering the hall as to not annoy Rusard, who at his age, had begun to struggle running behind the students. Cucumber and tuna sandwiches were laid on golder platters on one of the lounge's coffee tables. Around the teapot, Minerva and Filius were talking lively about the last exam session, at which more students than usual had gotten good grades. One was arguing that there must have been some cheating going on, while the other insisted that it was impossible that they missed such a ruse on the day of the exam.

Smiling at the sight of that, Hermione poured herself a cup of tea and came closer to the embedded bookshelf on the back wall, in the hope of finding a light festive read to devour in the few hours left before dinner. Sliding her finger delicately on the edge of the books in the first row to her right, she could not contain a small laugh when hearing the pretentious comment of Severus in the conversation : "See ! This is what you get for being nice to your students ! Fear and intimidation, that is the recipe for success - what, do I make you laugh, Ms Granger ? Five point from Gryffindor !"

"Severus, darling, if your students were less terrified by you, maybe it would do everyone some good… Especially for Poppy's stock of calming draughts, she is out every year on the very first week due to the rush of frightened first years…

Hermione couldn't help herself from interrupting Minerva to the advantage of Severus : "You have to admit that there have been many less melted cauldron accidents and explosions with Severus than with Slughorn." The better part was that Severus looked torn between shock, gratefulness and anger at the idea that she was paying him a compliment. How very fun to tease him !

Once she chose her book, she removed her gardening boots - she had not taken the time to change when she came in, after all she was on holidays, nothing could prevent her from dressing the way she liked. With a contented sigh, she let herself go on a maroon velvet couch near the window. With the reflection on the window of the christmas tree, lit with hundreds of magically attached light balls, and the mouthwatering smell of the hot chocolate, she felt perfectly comfortable and ready to launch herself into a long reading session.

"Do you want me to bring you a blanket as well, Ms Granger ?" rumbled Severus, looking furiously at her feet propped on the sofa, probably too close to him to his liking. Hermione laughed, spreading her legs even further on the cushion, a mere few centimeters away from putting her feet on his knees. He had sat there next to her after she did, while two other solitary couches were available on the other side of the room.

She tried to concentrate again on her reading but found herself rereading the same paragraph in a loop, the words melting beneath her eyes. She raised her gaze discreetly toward the Potions master, letting herself soak in the image of the man finally resting, one hand holding a potions journal, the other a cinnamon and ginger cookie. She could not help letting her eyes slide to his rolled over white sleeves, revealing toned forearms and slightly tinted blue and red nails ( _was it ink ?)_. His shirt was unbuttoned at the collar, tie-less, tucked nicely into well tailored black pants.

Since arriving at Hogwarts a few months earlier, she had had the opportunity of seeing Severus on multiple occasions without his robes and had to admit that he had cultivated the "mysterious dark look" to perfection. His face was admittedly atypical, with an overgrown nose and thin dry lips, his features perpetually drawn into a scowl, but his general looks left you wanting more, wanting to soak again and again in those deep dark eyes.

Which maybe explained why Hermione was having so much trouble with _Jane Eyre._

After an hour and a half of peaceful reading, Severus rose to inspect the contents of his locker. He rarely looked in it, because he never assigned optional added homework - why would you inflict yourself more homework to grade?

He almost close the door to the empty locker, when suddenly he noticed a sparkly thing on the bottom. _Sparkles?_ Taking the card out of the box with two fingers, as to not be contaminated more than needed by the rainbow explosion, he read it quickly, his eyes getting wider at each line. Shocked and exasperated, he let the card fall on the table were Pomona was seated.

"Oh my, Severus, by Merlin, you have become quite the school sex-symbol, haven't you? However, seducing students, a fourth year at that…" laughed Pomona loudly.

Willing to erase all traces of the unilateral love confession from Ms Vane, he incendioed the letter with a clap of his fingers, looking furiously at Pomona.

Interested, Hermione asked to the gathered professors if she could have an explanation. She was told that, to Severus' dismay, he had become very popular at Hogwarts amongst the teenage witches, to the point of receiving several love letters every trimester. It seemed that Ms Vane was the most tenacious of all, despite his many reprimands.

"By the way, Severus" said Minerva "talking about relationships, your 40th birthday is coming up isn't it? It's high time you thought about settling down… In my opinion I think that you will soon find the rare gem that you will marry!

To which Hermione added, on a low voice so as to only be heard by Severus : "I'm sure that you can ask Ms Vane to help with your wedding attire, as sparkles look delightful on you!", pointing to his silver and gold sparkle covered sleeve.

* * *

The next morning, Severus apparated into the quaint little town of Wraysbury, in the suburbs of London, hidden in a wooded area near a lake.

A few meters ahead, the path lead to a small english cottage, where geranium was blooming on the windows next to a variety of kitchen herbs.

The fact that these plants were surviving during the harsh winter, while a tempest had swept across the area only a few days ago, indicated the presence of a witch in the vicinity.

Taking a big breath in, and regretting having forgotten his cigarettes on the coffee table, Severus walked forward across the doorway and knocked on the white door. A few moments later, the door opened on a small old lady, with her greying hair pulled back into a neat bun and a pretty pearl necklace around her neck. She was wearing a soft blue breathable wizarding attire, her robes fastened around her neck but left to gape open over the rest of the outfit, falling softly in waves over her gold ballerina shoes. No one could accuse Severus Snape of being lazy with her clothing, nor to lack taste : at 70, she was still an independant, dynamic woman, interested by the latest wizarding fashion but also with a great style of her own.

After the unexpected death of her husband a few years ago, Severus feared that she would fall into depression, drowning her sorrows in alcohol, spending all day in her nightgown with greasy hair and distraught eyes. To his biggest surprise, after a few months of self reclusion after her husband's funeral, she had suddenly regained her love of life, claiming that her dear Edgar had visited her in a dream, encouraging her to keep enjoying life. That same morning, she had cast a powerful Incendio on all her black lace ladden closet, almost burning a big chunk of the house, and exhuming from the basement all her colourful attire.

However, if there was one thing to be said about aunt Hilda, it was that after this terrible event, she had decided to focus her energy on helping her loved ones achieve personal growth, and in particular her nephew, Severus. This meant both a complete loss of control over his wardrobe (goodbye work robes buttoned up to his chin) and meddling in his social life. It also explained why, while Severus had barely just sat down on the comfy living room couch, a cup of tea in one hand, she had immediately cut to the chase :

"So, my sweet darling Severus, what is going on in your life at the moment ? Any new friends, lovers ? Ah, it pleases me so to see you again !" she said, hidden a smile behind the flowery teacup.

"Nothing much. Teaching, Hogwarts, nothing new. And you dear aunt, how are you ?"

"Oh you know me, I am getting old… My doctor told me to slow down, they are really afraid that something might happen to my heart… And my joints are still killing me…"

Severus almost spit his tea right back. Aunt Hilda was no high level athlete but she was in a great physical shape, practising running and yoga on a regular basis. Since they had climbed the Ben Nevis mount in Scotland this summer, with the benediction of said doctor, Severus found himself very puzzled by this announcement. And then :

"At my age you know, you expect to enjoy a few grandchildren before leaving… My dear Edgar, he left much to early. I am definitely going to die before seing you married, with children and a happy little family… Don't you think it is high time for you to settle down, Severus ? You're almost 40 !"

A handkerchief in one hand, she slowly dabbed her cheeks to wipe off a few inexistant tears. With her other hand, she pushed a plate of white chocolate covered heart shaped biscuits toward Severus.

Vexed, Severus took one of the hearts and bit furiously in it. What a manipulative woman ! It was just as if she and Minerva had conspired to bother him as much as possible. He tried to deviate the conversation toward less sensitive topics, such as giving news about the other teachers. Aunt Hilda had an ongoing written correspondence with Professor McGonagall, whom she met at school, as well as friendly relationships with the rest of the team.

"I heard, my sweet, that two ex-students have joined you this year, is that right ?"

"Yes, aunt Hilda, Ms Granger and Mr Longbottom."

"Oh, Ms Granger, what a fantastic young lady ! I never skip her column in the Daily ! Such a clever girl ! Her last essay about deforestation in the Amazon was to touching, it left me in tears."

Great, he had to find another fan of Ms Granger. As if she didn't ruin Severus' life enough at Hogwarts, being told daylong how marvellous she was by teachers and students alike, she also had to ruin family holidays.

"She is currently writing an updated version of _Hogwarts, a History_. I guess her work is… passable, at best. Her writings are of a superior quality than her predecessor's, who had nothing between his ears. But that is certainly not a hard thing to achieve."

"Oh Severus, so many compliments, you must find her marvellous as well, I am sure of it !"

What he wouldn't do to get out of this room as fast as possible, and forget this nerve wrecking conversation !

When he finally could leave, going through the doorway with a nascent headache, he did not see aunt Hilda removing a small black and white photograph from a drawer, taken from afar of a young curly brown haired girl not looking into the lense.

"Hermione Snape, it does sound pretty nice." And aunt Hilda tilted her head back to let out a high pitched laugh. Her plan was in motion.

* * *

Sunday dinner at Hogwarts was a cosy and relaxed affair, with the traditional sunday roast, a juicy piece of meat with accompanying root vegetables, a magnificent yorkshire pudding and, in a separate sauce dish, what Severus liked the most : gravy. What a great joy to be able to enjoy the elfes' cooking, he thought, getting started voraciously on his plate, eyes drawn to the steaming hot apple pie that just appeared in the middle of the table.

Sat to his right, Ms Granger was deeply immersed in her new book - after Jane Eyre, she had her heart set on Mansfield Park. She held the book open with one hand, one side propped crookedly against the pepper mill, bringing a heaped spoon of soup to her mouth. It seemed miraculous that she had not yet missed the opening by a few centimeters, but it was also true that she probably considered the book as an extension of herself, making this an ordinary daily task.

Severus sharply closed the old book he was reading on his left - at least, _he_ had thought to cast his books to hold themselves open on their own. While the cover indicated that it was a Potions book, the content was actually a muggle science-fiction novel, a dystopia where the urban areas had removed green spaces, where the children born in cities did not draw trees but man made oxygen chimneys.

If Ms Granger's articles were to be believed, it might not be a dystopia but a possible future reality, if things did not change in the future. Maybe he should indeed have participated to the girl's Christmas workshop where she taught little green guerilleros to make and throw magical vegetal bombs to greenify cities.

Who would have thought that Severus Snape, first class grinch and complainer supreme, the scientifico-smartass, might care about such topics ?

Primo, what was the point of helping to erase Voldemort if mother Earth suffocated due to human negligence ? And secundo, science-fiction books… they were pretty cool, even for a wizard who nothing could surprise anymore. It moved the inner child in him, reminding him of the many years spent on the hardwood floor in his room, reading, dreaming, drawing : waiting that finally, finally ! the magical would reveal itself to him.

On the other side of Ms Granger, Minerva bent across the table toward Severus, bending forward to have a vision of him despite the hairy obstacle between them :

"So, Severus, Hilda tells me you have finally chosen to listen to our advice ?"

"What advice ?!" The surprise could probably be read on Severus' face because the old cow decided to elaborate her thoughts :

"Of finding a woman, of course ! By the way, what is the name of your date tomorrow… ?"

 _Of course,_ Ms Granger _had_ to rise her head from her book at that exact moment.

"You have a date, Severus ? Is she your Yule ball partner ?" she said, half amused and half… annoyed (?), biting her lips. Ms Granger had very dry lips. Did she not know that one could buy very efficient lip balms nowadays ? Ah, and there went a small drop of blood from a crack in the middle of her bottom lip, quickly caught by a swipe of her tongue. Severus diverted his gaze, looking at Minerva instead.

"I will have you know that my sentimental life is none of your business, ladies. If you must know, know that I will happily enjoy my bachelor status at the bal, and for the next days, months and years to come. That will be all."

Minerva squinted slightly, her face expression tightening a bit. "Listen to me you, my _darling_ Severus, I have know your aunt Hilda for decaded now, and I would very much like for you to please her a little. Hilda has found a real gem for you, a young woman named "Carole", a former Slytherin just like you even !"

"Quite a fox I tell you !" added Filius, never too far, with a rascal like look. Pomona, who was sat beside him, struck him on the head with her cloth napkin.

"In conclusion, you will do me a favour and take this woman on a coffee date tomorrow afternoon, and then you will ask her to the ball. Understood ?"

"No way !" answered Severus furiously. He had rosen from the table, angry, cold roast left forgotten in his plate. "It is my fucking life, Minerva, all right ? Not a game."

"Or you can also choose to be assigned to year long detention supervision, Gryffindors included. And help Hagrid with decorations for the ball."

This meant both spending every night in detention and giving up huge chunks of his free time, of the space that helped him face the little snots every day. The time alone with his paint brushes, his pencils, his potions, his dark arts artefacts… Pshiit, gone into smoke.

"...give me the address." Then, getting a grip on himself, he added vehemently : "But I swear this is the last time you are making me do something I don't want to, next time I won't hesitate getting out of here and good luck finding a competent potionist !"

Five mere seconds later, he had already left the room.

Leaving behind him, in the hands of a curious dark haired girl, an unlocked old book.

* * *

Lying on a battered brown leather couch in her apartments, her feets moving rhythmically up in the air, Hermione was reading. She had left the old book on her coffee table when she entered her rooms, thinking that she would give it back to Severus at the next meal. Then, too curious, she had delicately flipped the cover open, ready to discover all the great secrets of forgotten potions… finding instead an autograph of her favourite author ! Followed by a enthralling novel, annotated on the side with small scrawls. She had already read this piece once and found it marvellous but the pleasure of this second reading was mostly due to the black comments scribbled in between the lines, on the sides, under the text : wherever he could, Severus' thoughts was expressed with such liberty, without any filter. She felt guilty reading his intimate reflexions this way, in the manner of a diary.

However, captivated, she could not help keeping on reading, stopping only when morning came, as the nascent dawn light filtered through the curtains, drowning the room with a nice pink glow. While it was already time for breakfast, Hermione decided to finally close the book, sliding in between her soft sheets for a much needed sleep.

When she woke up six hours later, eyelids heavy with sleep and gaze unfocused, her stomach remind itself to her, rumbling loudly.

"Yes my sweet, it is time to go find something to eat in the kitchens…"

Pulling on robes and boots above her sleeping attire - showering could wait, even more so that she fulling intended on soaking in a deep hot batch instead - she walked intently toward the kitchens' painting, slaloming in the hallways to avoid colleagues and students. Lunch had just ended and a small gathering of fourth years was moving hurriedly toward the Transfiguration room, a heap of half clocks and half compasses in their arms.

In her hurry, Hermione walked faster, going right at the next crossing, going straight into a hard hot body.

"Ouch shit sorry… Severus ?"

She couldn't help letting out a surprised cry when she saw in what state the young professor was. It was likely that he had chosen to wear the most hideous outfit, as to repel her hopeful date. However, the bloody red lipstick mark on his collar, spilling onto his neck could not be misread : his date had probably found him irresistible.

"Ms Granger, I beg you to get out of my way, as you can see I am distressed enough and have only one think I desperately need : finding a shovel to dig my own hole, so that I can _finally_ be left in peace !"

Hermione burst into laughter, out of control and lively, while Severus added, frowning and mouth wrinkled into an unhappy scowl :

"If all you desire is make fun of me, in that case I have nothing more to add to you, Ms Granger. I bid you goodbye."

He acted as if he wanted to get around her and go on his way, when Hermione, finally snapping out her laughter, caught his sleeve with her fingertips and asked with a friendly smile :

"Lets have tea together and you can tell me all about it, alright ? You don't have anywhere to be right now, do you ?"

Then she added in a teasing way : "It is my duty to prevent the tragic disparition of the famous Severus Snape !"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two chapters left before New Year with Hermione and Snape (and of course, the plotting old ladies !)


End file.
